Sunday, October 21, 2012

Shit We Did as Kids (Part One)

First of all, Mom, I'd like to state there is a statute of limitations for all the actions listed below.  Also, you were an awesome mom, I was just a ninja.  You knew nothing of this.  Love you Mom. 'k...

1.  Ran away from the cops once.  Alright, wasn't like I was in process of a felony or anything.  Me, my friend and my brother just took a shortcut through some private property which were these giant grain tanks next to my house in Bishop.  Patrol car saw us, next thing I know my brother and my friend are already a football field away.

2.  Climbed these giant grain tanks next to my house in Bishop.  I guess you can say I climbed to the highest point in Bishop if you take out the water tower.  Everything looked different from up there.  Bishop actually looked awesome... for me to poop on!!! nah, jk that's gross.  Did pee from way up there though.

3.  Snuck into Jr. High homecoming dance, got busted... in the middle of a slow dance! Busted because I was still in elementary dating an older chick.  What can I say, I was badass.

4.  Played tag...  hid on top of houses, under houses, and in these giant grain tanks next to my house in Bishop.  (Those tanks were bad influences)

5.  Played dodge the arrow.  Neighbor had a bow and arrow.  Arrow was those dome tipped kind but it was still an arrow.  We'd shoot it in the air and run for our lives.

6.  Walked the railroad tracks like it was a sidewalk, took daily shortcut through giant grain tanks next to my house in Bishop.  Bet a whole bunch of kids that live on westside in Bishop still do this.  Good lord city officials, build the kids a damn sidewalk already.

7.  Actually, this one is on my guardians.  Stood up in the car when I was really little while car was in motion.  WTH?  Seriously mom?  Did they not teach you kinetic energy in school?

8.  Stayed up 24 hours playing NBA Jam tournaments.

9.  Egged cars, got what I deserved.  C'mon, everyone's egged something.  We egged cars really late at night and let's admit it... if you were driving down 2nd street in Bishop after midnight you were drinking and driving and you deserved it.  Oh, and one time a car stopped and I turned to run, tripped, and landed on my eggs... por pendejo!

10.  Bottle rocket war.  Yes, we lit bottle rockets and shot them at each other.  We   were   that   stupid.  We even managed to get a head shot on Michael Suarez.  That's when shit got real.

So there's my top 10.  I will be damned if my boys do any of this crap.  I don't even let them play in the back yard without the window open because I know how Stupid I was when I was little.  How I only have a handful of scars and only two sets of stitches is beyond me.  It was a pretty cool ride though.

1 comment:

  1. Well lessons learned as a kid, makes you a good dad. First thing that comes to mind about the grain tanks, is Thank-God you never got hurt.It's a guy thing peeing from atop. lol I agree about the sidewalks, there was many a time I walked home from the eastside from school to go home to 2nd st on the west side, that was my home as well. About #7 I remember going to Kingsville with my dad in the front seat next to him driving doing 70. They didn't have those seatbelt laws then. lol about you falling on the eggs!!

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